Everyone wanted to be loved. They seek for love and do everything for it. Everybody holds for love. Everybody feels for love. Everybody heals with love.
During my freshman year on one of the most popular High School in our small town, there's this tradition where you get to choose not to be a stiff or popular and all it actually bothers me, because you need to be cool in order to be accepted. I found myself in a situation where I have to choose from both, and make a decision that will change my life forever. I need to get out and show off. Desperately. Finding the right guy is difficult, and right means a guy who is popular enough, riding a scooter, good looking guy who wears varsity jacket with hoodie even though its 90 degrees outside.
Well, during my high school year I was a geek, shy, duff, always scared and not popular one. Who would've thought I will be able to find a guy who is fit enough for what I am looking for (Or WHAT EVERYBODY'S LOOKING FOR) Jerome, his name is. Junior. He's in a volleyball team and is a captain. He's good looking plus he rides a scooter. Those guys you see in a movies and all.
We dated for 4 months and take our relationship to the next level. He was my first kiss, but It was an awkward kind of kiss. Because he kissed me in front of the student body... (NIGHTMARE!!!) We've done a lot of things that a normal couple would do (but not the most important one FYI). It was fun and life changing. Plus, he saved my life from everything. We have been couple for 3 years. YES! We actually made it.
But then, since bad things are coming through. He has to go to college. Leave the downtown state and moved in the big city (He's in France now). He got in to a marine state. Future coming through.
Stop Crying. Stop crying. He's leaving me...
I cant help it. My tears are streaming down my cheeks. Wondering if I can beg him to stop for 1 year and wait for me until i get to college or enter a near uni from town. Well, that wont happen anyway. He has to do it for his future. Not for me, neither for us. Who am I kidding? I don't have the right to oblige him for my own happiness.
9th of April 2009, 3 days after my birthday. The day he's going to leave the town and move in to a new and bigger city, the day he's going to leave me and maybe find a new hot girl. We see each other for the last time. Well, we did cried a lot as if its the end of the world. As if someone of us is dying of euthanasia. He was sad. I was sad and all, a hopeful kind of sad. A kind of sad that just takes time to heal. He is my first love. An unfathomable first love.
Last minute, he pulled something in his pocket. He held my hand and surprisingly put a ring on. A promise ring, and I began to cry. He pulled me into his. I found myself near his face. Just an inches away for us to kiss. I knew he would kiss me on the lips. Instead, he kissed my forehead.
"Wait for me. I'll see you soon. I love you"
That's the last word I heard from him and that's what's keeping me.
I still keep the ring he gave to me. Main reason to have hope that one day he'll come back. Even though I see some of his photos hanging out with a girl and/or dating another girl. I wont mind! I am still keeping it. I am still waiting.
Waiting for forever...
Aubrey
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